Hegseth Accidentally Texts Houthis Detailed List of His Cosmetics

[SunSeeker]

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In the latest embarrassment to rock the Trump administration, Pete Hegseth admitted on Friday that he accidentally texted Houthi rebels a detailed list of the makeup products he uses before appearing on television.

The embattled defense secretary said that he had mistakenly sent the Houthis a cosmetics order intended for Sephora.

A spokesman for the Houthis thanked Hegseth for continuing to share his personal information with them, adding that his NFL draft predictions helped them win thousands of dollars Thursday night on FanDuel.

https://www.borowitzreport.com/p/hegseth-accidentally-texts-houthis

[Blue Owl]

1. JD Vance speculates it may be Maybeline

[spooky3]

2. I promise not to hate them because they are beautiful. Nt

[milestogo]

5. In China Vance is known as "eyeliner man".

That's what he gets for calling them peasants.

[EYESORE 9001]

3. I was so ready to believe this

Sad that I considered it plausible.

[Kid Berwyn]

4. The Vainglorious Fighting 666th Makeup Brigade

The Happy Epsteins



"Always Look Good"

[Traildogbob]

6. Damn ya'll

I lost a mouth full of Louis Jadot Pinot Noir Bourgogne through my nose and onto my guitar.
Shame!!!! But damn funny. Maybe my nose vessels absorbed the alcohol. Definitely can distinguish all the notes of flavors better than sticking my nose into a deep wine glass. There are cherries, almonds, Chocolate and a hint of blueberry.

[LetMyPeopleVote]

7. Nothing screams "warrior culture" more than a make up studio