Naked Tweaker Desecrated A Baptismal Font
Le sigh
A North Dakota man tweaking on meth yesterday stripped off his clothes and went into a church’s baptismal font before emerging to walk toward the altar while masturbating, an affront witnessed by 75 individuals attending mass, according to a probable cause affidavit.
A female church employee called police after Burdick (seen at right) disrobed and entered the font, where he was “masturbating facing the altar.” Burdick, she added, then “began walking down the aisle toward the altar while still masturbating.”
Witness Darrell Kilzer, 68, told police that Burdick began to “splash around” in the “Holy Water fountain.” Kilzer added that Burdick later “entered the sanctuary with his ‘machinery’ hanging out and was ‘pumping’ himself.”
Father Todd Kreitinger, who was conducting mass when Burdick arrived, said that the intruder “dipped his rear-end into the Holy Water fountain and splashed around a bit before entering the sanctuary while masturbating.” The priest, pictured below, added that the font would have to be cleaned and sanitized, a process that would cost the church about $500.
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