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Cancer Support

Rorey

(8,514 posts)

3. How could anyone expect you to know what you're doing?

Reply to cynatnite (Original post)

Wed Apr 18, 2018, 06:55 PM

Apr 2018

It sounds like this is very new to you, and it's understandable that you'd be in a panic.

Maybe your mother's oncologist will have some ideas of where you can get support, and also some direction for what to do and when. I would say that if your mother is still of sound mind, she should get to make the decisions.

My parents both had cancer and died eight months apart. We were given a thing called "Five Wishes" which is an advance directive that your mother can fill out to make sure that HER wishes are honored. You can check out this site for Advance Directive options for your state: https://www.tn.gov/health/health-program-areas/health-professional-boards/hcf-board/hcf-board/advance-directives.html

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24 replies

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I honestly don't know what the hell I'm doing... [View all] cynatnite Apr 2018 OP

Trust your instincts voteearlyvoteoften Apr 2018 #1

Nobody knows what the hell they are doing. Turbineguy Apr 2018 #2

I agree with hospice, my mother passed in December and was first in palliative care blueinredohio Apr 2018 #7

During the last couple of days I was able call them Turbineguy Apr 2018 #14

How could anyone expect you to know what you're doing? Rorey Apr 2018 #3

First, my heart goes out to you. Siwsan Apr 2018 #4

great advice! Long Term memory goes last but im not sure how that works.. samnsara Oct 2018 #24

I'm so sorry Phoenix61 Apr 2018 #5

First, I suggest you find a local cancer support group. They can assist you in whatever way you need sinkingfeeling Apr 2018 #6

This message was self-deleted by its author sinkingfeeling Apr 2018 #8

You have perfectly described what its like to be a caregiver for a seriously ill parent. enough Apr 2018 #9

Thank you all! cynatnite Apr 2018 #10

I believe that Advance Directives are legally binding Rorey Apr 2018 #12

Your sister may not mean harm Rorey Apr 2018 #13

Your state probably has rules about Advance Directives RandomAccess Apr 2018 #18

As far as diet goes.... Rorey Apr 2018 #11

My dad had lung cancer. procon Apr 2018 #15

what a great account RandomAccess Apr 2018 #19

Lots of good advice above. Yonnie3 Apr 2018 #16

When my uncle went into a coma for 4 weeks, I learned a few things Farmer-Rick Apr 2018 #17

You are stronger than you think. alfredo Apr 2018 #20

Make sure you mother knows you love her and will care for her. JayhawkSD Apr 2018 #21

My experience with food when on chemo Jim Lane Apr 2018 #22

(((hugs))) samnsara Oct 2018 #23