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chowmama

(1,117 posts)
32. There are stages. So many stages.
Tue May 12, 2026, 03:24 PM
May 12

And all of them take patience, gentleness and time. Celebrate (quietly) every one.

You've gotten to the slow blink stage in only a day - that's a significant step. It'll be a while before he's completely able to feel safe with you and comfortable in his new environment, but a truly fearful cat doesn't dare close their eyes around others. He'll still spook and skitter at every move, but will slowly learn which are to be expected and may offer good things.

It's going to be hard for him to adjust; he had no one to teach him how to interact with humans, and he probably wasn't with the litter long enough to even be socialized with other cats. He'll get just as frustrated as you will. But he'll be slowly tempted to interact with you because you're there. You'll learn each other's way of communicating.

Assuming the environment is safe and escape-proof, let him choose to wander or stay in the kennel. He may even hide for a day or two and come out at night for the food, water and litter box. He'll reappear. He may still prefer a high perch for safety and will probably always need a quiet hidey-hole when there's noise. (We've got water pipe repair on the block today, and Fast Eddie is currently vanished into the...something. He's never completely recovered from his parking lot dumpster beginnings. He'll be out and complaining to the heavens soon enough. Probably around dinnertime, assuming they've gone. Otherwise, we'll be eating late. The other two are dealing better, but they were never ferals.)

A big step will be when he's secure enough to sleep out in the open; that could be a while, but he may start keeping you company from a distance fairly soon. Windows with a view of birds and squirrels are very appealing, if the traffic noise isn't too loud.

Anyway, a first step in a day is really encouraging. Once he stops believing every moment is a fight for his life, he may be less feral than expected. Just - lots of love, even from a distance, really good gooshy food and treats on the regular, and soft quiet places to lay. Don't push (but nudge) and give it time.

Recommendations

1 members have recommended this reply (displayed in chronological order):

Long leather gloves.. ZDU May 12 #1
While holding... 2naSalit May 12 #2
Fortunately, vet clipped the kitten's toenails! :) allegorical oracle May 12 #8
It will take time. At first just bring him food, step away and let him eat. Ocelot II May 12 #3
Yes! Photos please!!! ZDU May 12 #6
Don't hold your breath. Got my first-ever smart phone this Christmas allegorical oracle May 12 #15
Appreciate the advice. Have had "farm" cats, here for the past 43 years, but allegorical oracle May 12 #9
Yes SuzyandPuffpuff May 12 #4
Thank you for answering my post. While I'm experienced with the feline allegorical oracle May 12 #10
Infinite patience. GiqueCee May 12 #5
That's one trait I have. But not being able to nuzzle him is frustrating. He allegorical oracle May 12 #12
He'll come around... GiqueCee May 12 #18
When you look at him UpInArms May 12 #7
Oh I've been doing that. Am getting slow blinks from him and take some allegorical oracle May 12 #13
A lot of patience and love. He's so afraid so it will take time to trust you. TommieMommy May 12 #11
Congratulations! Hope I can get there with Oliver. I've only had him with me for allegorical oracle May 12 #14
Just a BIT!!!! DEEEEEEEP, SLOOOOOOOW breaths! niyad May 12 #20
He might like the Churu tubes of pate. You can clip off the end and slowly squeeze out the pate... 3catwoman3 May 12 #16
He is a black shorthair. I've always been partial to black kitties, altho' I've allegorical oracle May 12 #22
We have a brother-sister pair of Siamese mix. Fitz, the brother, is a blue point with pale blue... 3catwoman3 May 12 #25
Wow -- they sound gorgeous. Cats sometimes remind me of marbles... allegorical oracle May 12 #40
I raised 4 feral kittens Laurelin May 12 #17
Ooh I'll try the baby food. Thank you. Agree with your quietness advice. I've allegorical oracle May 12 #24
Fun! Laurelin May 12 #33
Same here. Once my husband died I had too much to do. Plus, friends of allegorical oracle May 12 #35
Utah, i have fiends who still have horses Laurelin May 13 #43
Check the labels to make sure it is single ingredient baby meat. 3catwoman3 May 12 #34
Oh thanks for the warning. I will check first. :-) allegorical oracle May 12 #36
Sending love and hugs from my furbaby and me to you and Oliver. niyad May 12 #19
Thank you. Always read your posts and appreciate them. nt allegorical oracle May 12 #41
awwww, thank you. Please keep us posted. niyad May 12 #42
Don't keep him crated. Jirel May 12 #21
Oh you're encouraging :) I have him in my second bathroom, a tiled floor with a allegorical oracle May 12 #23
That's good, but he needs to explore places and smells. cksmithy May 12 #28
So true. Just like us, eh? allegorical oracle May 12 #37
Put him on the other side of a ckosed door. Play with him applegrove May 12 #26
My feral kitten Catlady123 May 12 #27
6-8 weeks gay texan May 12 #29
You might check out "tiny kittens" on youtube -- a group in Vancouver who deals with feral kittens/cats. fierywoman May 12 #30
Will do. Thank you. Love the Canadians. allegorical oracle May 12 #38
Time & patience Blue Owl May 12 #31
There are stages. So many stages. chowmama May 12 #32
OMGosh -- fast Eddie! How cute. Thank you for that encouragement and a allegorical oracle May 12 #39
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