so I got a Christmas card from my sister today

[eilen]

4. I think I would acknowledge that message she gave you

Her resentment and dislike for you, I mean. I would verbally release her. Just tell her you know how she feels and you have let her go since that time and she is free to live her life without duty or obligation to you. Tell her that since you let her go after that pronouncement, you have noticed that you have a better life in which you do not let yourself be abused in order to maintain family relationships. Thank her for releasing you from your earlier sister worship as it was destructive for you. Wish her well and go on.

I think that will also help release yourself as well of those chords.

Her problems are her problems. She might be sending you cards because she either is feeling disconnected and adrift in the world, feels bad for being such a cruel bitch, wants to maintain a surface relationship that has a general kind vibration to it-- she wishes you well but doesn't want to be close or maybe she does want to retrieve that relationship of you being a soft touch when she needs/wants something-- who knows. But honestly, you don't ever have to open another Christmas card or engage in telephone conversations with her. Yes, it is good to forgive and healing from the feelings of rejection and hurt is important. You have to consider what the healthy choice is after forgiveness so that does not necessarily mean a renewed relationship with her.

((((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))))